Friday, December 28, 2007

Of Robben and Rain?

Well, my songwriting has exploded and nearly simultaneously tapered in a surge of creativity squelched by the bustle of the holidays… In re-priming the creative pistons lately I can already tell that it will be moderately harder to fire up this time around. I need real inspiration, not contrived or forced… (?)

Meanwhile…songs are being tested and tried at open mics around Tacoma and overall, the reception has been positive. Of the tunes tried so far, “No Place for a Lady” and “Addict” are favorites (so I’ve been told). Remarkably enough, these are the most ‘Justice’ related songs which, I have to think, is indicative of the outcry of my generation for positive change mixed with the current movement of God. Granted, my sample group is a small one, but the consensus echoes throughout all social groups in my life: God is the answer and His love is the cure. May my story lift peoples lives every time I touch a microphone or strum Sergio, Twinkles, or Grandma (guitars: Ibanez, Takamine, and Gibson respectively) ….

On a separate note, I’m trying to set up studio time to record a demo for my solo stuff as well as for I Am Justice (more to come). Gabriel McPhereson is going to aid my efforts but unfortunately, like every highly skilled person, he is a VERY busy man. He assures me that my schedule-badgering is welcome and necessary to keep the ships sailing forward (wow, kinda corny); so I’ll persist. Not sure what to call my EP…(I’ve got 3 months to decide). I’m toying with the following:

  • Robben Isle (in Honor of Nelson Mandela)
  • After Breakfast and Blood¨
  • Rain City
  • Melodic History

Currently I favor Robben and Rain (hey that might be a good title: Robben and Rain…!?) but haven’t locked one in yet. Anyway, if someone actually reads to this point, you may be good ears to tell: Take everything you have and give it all away for God – use every moment to effect change in the world.

Friday, September 14, 2007

Heartbeat

I’ve been given the priviledge of a near-death experience. I know w/out a doubt that my life is a testimony to the goodness of God and His hand in our lives.

This is the latest song I’ve written and it’s purposed to somewhat address the miracle God has done in my life - "Heartbeat". Whether or not it will make it off this Blog into some other media medium is uncertain…either way, the message of grace remains:

--------------------

"Heartbeat"

Running away will never erase
All of the tears of yesterday
But meeting the Savior face to face
Makes all things new

Caught in a moment of history – the day you gave your life

Jesus saw salvation through the defeated cross and empty tomb
My beating heart I give to you
Father my heart beats for you

The light of the world is the Father’s grace
Our future’s full of better days
May justice rise and mercy reign
To make all things new

Caught in a moment of history – the day you gave your life

Jesus saw salvation through the defeated cross and empty tomb
My beating heart I give to you
Father my heart beats for you

My life’s a walking miracle
Your grace is unmistakeable
Shattered lives are made brand new
All my life my heart beats for You

-------------

…rgf

Friday, September 7, 2007

The Historic

ACTION: Seriously now, real live action….... History is not something that happens - history is made, history is manufactured and produced. It is made and labored over, concentrated on and meticulously shaped; history pages are written by those who are willing to pay the price and tirelessly forget the mindless things, the pointless activities, and choose to spend their 24/7 forging a legacy for generations to come.

History is deliberately fabricated. By whom? By the movers and shakers, the energetic and disruptive, the bold and the risky, the thoughtful and the calculated. Earth is a huge place that requires huge amounts of self-application and diligence. Historic boat-shakers are the people that are consumed by cause, passion, conviction, action, and devotion to the end-product that will be our eulogy. The eulogy? What will it read for me? I've only got a dash of time to figure that out so I'd better get to work - fast, hard, and focused. With outstretched arms and neck, my death will mark a life of no regret, no reserve, and no compromise.

So many theories will never make the books; so many intentions will never make an ounce of difference or add a drop of value to anyone or anything besides their originator. Distraction is not an option and tiredness has no home among the wave makers and culture shapers. Centuries will tell of those who lived every diminutive moment with the everlasting in mind.

Will my life be a body of text on the pages of history or will my days occupy the abundant and empty white space that only backdrops the pictures, text, and exploits of the historic? Great question. I know I'll do my best to fashion history with the ever-increasing inventory in my young, green hands; confidently I'll step forward to be counted among the few to die on the frontlines with faith at my back and purpose before me. By the grace of God these 80+ I spend alive will amount to a little more to the world than a reallocated social security number and an old weathered headstone. Of course, last time I checked, I've got the ultimate history maker in my corner of the ring…in which case... what am I waiting for?
...rgf

Thursday, September 6, 2007

To Know is to Worship

Worship is the relentless appreciation, acknowledgment, and expression of admiration of any entity for all it has either accomplished or has been perceived to have accomplished. Ultimate worship, therefore, is the relentless appreciation, acknowledgement, and expression of admiration of the ultimate originator, author, and perfector of our world’s most admirable concepts, acts, ideas, beings, and constructs. Everyone worships; the key variance across cultures and people is not if they worship but rather what they worship.

A quick side note: the scope of this discussion is worship; I will leave the theist vs. atheist philosophy apologetics to the likes of more intelligent and more widely respected thinkers, of which I am not included. I do not wish to prove the existence, sovereignty, or nature of God; I only wish to illustrate the importance and urgency of worship and what it requires to be a worshiper in the midst of a real, overwhelming, and awesome God in light the love-sacrifice He made through Jesus Christ. For the sake of this discussion, I default to the core belief that God is all powerful and all loving (Theodicy to be handled by C.S. Lewis) and therefore worthy of all worship; enough said.

This Being, inevitably God, therefore worthy of our relentless worship is to be revered with ultimate respect and admiration while simultaneously being adorned with all we can conceivably give: our life, our actions, our emotions, and all of our physical and metal faculties. “Our God who has done immeasurably more” than we can perceive is the ultimate object of our human worship. So our charge is this: to gain wisdom and understanding (Proverbs 2) of, and open our minds eyes to all the vast greatness of who God is and the constructs and conceptions of His divine mind and sovereign hands; for once we know truth our lives will know no greater purpose than to admire and worship the Creator of all – God.

The Rocks Cry Out
Every created thing carries with it the fingerprint of its creator; the script of our world and its inhabitants inevitably resounds with the tone and likeness who God is, what He is like, and how He thinks. All strands of study - be they physical sciences (biology, astrology, physics, etc), philosophical studies, mathematical theories, mental processes, tangible and intangible concepts, or any other study – can be unequivocally tied off at the same knot; God. With the acknowledgement of who God is and His role in the physical realm, we are compelled if not forced to turn our eyes to the spiritual.

By examining the vast complexities of the human body – the biological code written in DNA, each cells mechanism for disposing of waste, the Nervous system, the eye, the birth of a new child – I am left with one option: awe and worship of the Author. By staring into space and dwelling on the immeasurable span of stars, planets, physical phenomena, and cosmic processes I am forced to my intellectual knees in humble admiration. By listening to and internalizing a perfectly compiled musical score and reflecting on the mathematical theory behind each note, harmonic, and measure I am moved by the physical energy of sound into an emotional state of mind – one I would not have entered in the absence of the power of math, energy, and music. Who conceived these everyday miracles? Who wrote the script that the world and everything in it is reading from?

No matter what I ponder or study, everything leads me back to one key observation: through knowledge of the complexities of the physical world around me, I am compelled into relentless appreciation, acknowledgment, and expression of my admiration toward God. Even the rocks cry out with the praises and worship of God; everything they are is everything God ever created them to be, complexities and all. If we are willing to acknowledge and listen, all creation cries out with the admiration and reality of who God is. All physical aside, my mind is quickly overwhelmed when I begin to consider the ramifications of our consciousness and what implications it has for the indescribable force that God truly is; a discussion worthy of many more hours of study and writing.

The Only Logical Conclusion: HOW?
So we are left where we started, only now in worship. In view of all He has accomplished, once our minds are spent, and mental processes evolve from a manic, frantic jitter of thought-flashes into a slow, tired, dull pace, we sigh with relief at the paradoxical simplicity of what we have to do: worship God with all we possibly can. At this pivotal point, it then becomes not a question of WHY we should worship, but HOW.

How can I, a single being in a limited frame of time, mind, and ability, bring worship and praise to the God of the entire universe in a way that catches His attention and brings Him pleasure? Is there a word or phrase that I can utter that would satisfy this mandate or my hearts yearning? Will I ever be able to give God the amount of glory and gratitude that he deserves? Is there anything I can do to truly show Him the relentless appreciation, acknowledgment, and admiration that He has caused me to feel? HOW do I worship? That, my friend, is a discussion best left for another day.

Monday, August 20, 2007

Laser Cats 2

LASER CATS 2

Friday, August 17, 2007

An Offered Heart

Or meum tibi offero domine prompte et sincere - “my heart I offer to you Lord promptly and sincerely"

My brain and heart have been racked for at least two years by the concept of obedience. I am continually baffled by the actual meaning of the word and my inability to meet and become everything that requires a life of obedience. Many excellent, far more intelligent, and far more insightful scholars have tackled this subject in thousands of hours and pages attempting to explain it to dense people just like me…to no avail, I am still baffled. So what you read is not my attempt to explain obedience to you but rather an effort of mine to articulate (for myself and whoever listens) the portions which I do understand in a way that I can build on in the years to come.

Forgive me if I leave this entry unresolved and relatively naked of witty puns and quips…as I stare at this mountain of a concept I anticipate losing brain-steam somewhere around the foothills and my current stock of mental granola is running low at best.

My chief question(s) about obedience is simply this: what is it and can I do it?

I always reminisce back to an entirely vivid experience I had when I was 17 years old…

(Scooby Doo blur effect…………and ……… NOW>>>>)

It was an overcast day, which was unusual for Panama City in July – the heat kept up despite the clouds and it had just rained hard so humidity was high. My memory starts as we cross the Panama Canal headed west past Diablo Heights, a suburb of Panama City. As I look out the shuttle window, the shipping lanes are busy and the canal looks muddy blue with specks of gray and white watercraft hundreds of feet below. We had been filed into the shuttle like inmates despite our purely voluntary involvement and my stomach was beginning to beg for the peanut butter and grape jelly sandwich it had grown so accustomed to. A summer with Teen Mania Ministries is unlike any other summer experience any teenager will ever have otherwise: from jungle treks and street dramas to worship nights and native interaction…it was an experience well worth the fundraising and strict diet of PB&J.

A windy half-highway led us to a small villa perched in the hills where we were greeted by a small Panamanian woman, Lisa, in an apron and a pink dress. She had a nurse’s hat on and the look of love on her face was so pure you could hear all she was thinking despite the language barrier. She readily welcomed our group of 15 teenage Americans into her establishment. As we entered, what we saw was truly one of the most heartbreaking and uncomfortable scenes I had ever been exposed to. The smell was unidentifiable but strong and closely resembled a hospital – the place was filled with nurses expressing the same care and devotion expressed so obviously by Lisa. The orphans were not just orphans, they were the rejected, the sick, physically misshapen, mentally retarded, and chronically helpless.

This organization exists to help those forsaken by all, to catch the dropped, and provide hope and love to the most hopeless and unloved. If anyone in the world could succeed Mother Theresa it would be one of these women. As dedicated servants these modern-day saints spend their lives at the service of the unattractive and those unable to express or give gratitude or compensation. They spend their lives wiping the chins and changing the diapers of children whose own mothers either cannot or will not do it themselves. “As you do unto the least of these, you do unto me” immediately pops into my mind; I immediately turn to see little Jorge through the bedroom window playing on the spent playground equipment and instead of a handicapped little boy, I am reminded that this is Jesus. So we spend the next 2 hours and 15 minutes helping Lisa and her co-workers feed, change, talk to, play with, and entertain the small children of her home before we are prompted to pack back into our shuttle and out of that place. As we say our goodbyes, Lisa gives and receives hugs, gives and receives love, and waves as we drive back down the windy road.

We experienced for 135 minutes what Lisa spends her lifetime living – that night, when we were debriefing the “experience” she was tucking the children into their beds and tending to the meal preparations for the next day. As we woke up sluggishly the next morning, she sprang out of her bed to change the soiled sheets of Jesus. When the glimmer and glow faded, she stayed late to keep the midnight oil burning – to spread the love and light of the cross. Obediance…

I can’t help but wonder if I could do what she has been called and chosen to do. If asked, would I be able to forsake my current life at any cost to serve in Lisa’s shoes? I don’t say this as a “whoa is me” revelation but rather a sober realization of what it could mean to serve in obedience. Christ was the ultimate example of obedience when he was found in Gethsemane bleeding from stress as he cried to God to release him from the coming trial. Tired and broken, he submits yet one more time to God and admits “not my will but yours be done”. The result? Salvation for all, and access to God for Jew and Gentile. Despite the focus on Love and Kindness and Forgiveness – all necessary things - Christ had NO desire to carry out the cross but he did so anyways. Obedience set the world free.

…rf

Or meum tibi offero domine prompte et sincere - “my heart I offer to you Lord promptly and sincerely"

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Alas! Blomment 1 Has Arrived

Alas, my first blog-comment has arrived; ceremoniously, as a Tribute, I affectionately named it Blomment 1 – just as the Intergalactic Starfleet of Nations would name it’s prototype starship embarking on it’s maiden voyage with which it will prove to the galaxy that space travel is not only possible, but the proverbial air that will be breathed by healthy economies galaxy-wide. The ramifications of such a breakthrough are absolutely, unmistakably, and breathtakingly stifling. Take a second to imagine the possibilities and the analogous comparisons that could be used to illustrate the potential herein:

Blomment 1 is like… the first ray of sun kissing your rain drenched skin after a November night’s monsoon… Blomment 1 is like the first whiff of your lover’s musk as you prepare the two pounds of ham you will consume in the hottub of the Welsley Inn in the company of Mrs. Hernandez. Blomment 1 is like the quiet, slightly awkward, yet fully-loaded tension you felt the first time you beat Contra without using more than 1 cheat code. Blomment 1: the flint that ignites the flame which will be used to spark the fuse that will trigger the bomb that is MY BLOG!!!!

Today is a good day, a day of victory…where my tired, nearly defeated typing fingers can retire to their tents because they know that for now…for today…for this moment… the battle sways in their favor. They will surely rest, for tomorrow brings another day and their strength will need to match the arduous mental contemplations that lie ahead. So to my Indexes, my middles, my Thumbs, and my Pinkies – find strength, for you will be sorely needed in the future of the Bloggo-war, and tomorrow is a brand-new day. If you should find yourselves discouraged, remember this: Comments come and comments may go, but Blomment 1 has defeated the foe.

RF

Friday, July 27, 2007

I Miss Fuzzy Nuts

Where have the days gone where I can be entertained, occupied, and somewhat-slash-very-fulfilled by the exploits of my small, furry rodent friend comically dubbed Fuzzy Nuts? Oh how his adventures satisfied my most childlike inclinations while simultaneously awakening the barbarian nether-regions of my man-soul. It’s not just about the sweet action sequences that surround Fuzzy Nuts or the magnetic charisma with which he swoons even the most resistant of female persona; my reflection is triggered by what he, along with friend Captain Bushy Butt, symbolize: courage, character, freedom, whimsicality, and fun.

In the midst of all my dreams and ambitions that successfully keep my mind and time continually monopolized, I am often poked and prodded into what I would consider the proverbial eye-of-the-storm. In this eye, the calm, I am usually forced to boil down all the clutter that creeps into my life; I am forced to take on a retrospective point of view and simplify because otherwise I would find myself crushed by the turbulence. Through this simplification I re-prioritize, dump non-feasible goals, and altogether come to the realization of one irrefutable truth: I miss Fuzzy Nuts.

There lives a man of legendary rapport in the quaint central GA town of Statesboro. Twas (yes…, ‘Twas’) this man who ingeniously birthed the epic adventures of little Fuzzy Nuts. This man, who embodies the word ‘hero’ in every sense, in every language, and in every context, has in innumerable ways inspired countless people (of which I consider myself chief) to live life without reserve, without regret, and without compromise. The exact human replica of everything idealized by Fuzzy is not only upheld by this man, Mr. Nuts is a fractional portion – a mere chip off the block of who this man is. This man, who routinely defies all physics and chance is fueled by the even-more-so boiled down spirit of Fuzzy Nuts.

John, thank you for all you are to this world. Whether you know it or not, your example has transformed me into a better man, a stronger husband, a truer friend, and a more lethal knife fighter. You are my Fuzzy Nuts; thanks for reminding me of what really matters and how to fight for what I believe in. One day, maybe one day, I’ll be your Captain Bushy Butt.

Thanks buddy

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

I blog. I write. I share. And I publish. For whom?

Periodically I get contemplative… the 12 minutes I have to cram hours of thought (before and after now) will most likely prove inadequate; however, something is better than nothing, and something (even small) will trigger the memory/emotion I am trying to capture…

I blog. I write. I share. And I publish. For whom?

I read my vast blog consisting of two entries today and had a surprisingly depressing epiphany. I have (0) comments on both of my entries.! Nobody in all cyberspace has stumbled upon my rantings and found them worthy of a comment, of 20 seconds of their data-transfer-rate-monopolized time. Sure, I know that it’s not unreasonable to have NO comments (or readers for that matter) on such a new, pointless, uninteresting series of bytes on a monitor. My point is not that I feel bad b/c nobody reads my blog. No-one knows about it… I was stricken by the amount of loneliness triggered by the revelation that though I write as if to an audience of thousands, I know in my not-so-subconscious mind that nobody is listening. Why do I care?... Truly? I don’t. I Blog. I write. I share. And I publish. For whom? For me. By blogging regularly I can see at least a few benefits to my immediate and long term well being. With 2 minutes left I’ll attempt to use record breaking articulation and brevity:

By blogging I:

1) Express Feelings Clearly.

2) Improve my writing skills.

3) Build a wittier vocabulary… non-witty writing is boring and even more pointless than this is now.

4) Build a blog that may prove entertaining to someone, somewhere, someday, when I’m somewhat famous.

5) Document a fraction of my thoughts and happenings.

6) … I feel like I’m contributing to the phenomenon of the web.

So why loneliness? Of all emotions…why this? Why not jubilation for the privacy I have maintained on my thoughts? Why not anger toward all the unknowingly and unintentionally unappreciative people that so vehemently ignore me? Why not apathy? That would be a nice change of pace… Apathy is an unaffordable luxury for anyone who wants to do anything valuable in this world… So I choose loneliness (against my will of course).

Till next time…self – I know where you sleep and I’m gonna get you…

Friday, July 13, 2007

Cash Well Spent

I recently purchased two CDs through iTunes; Maroon 5’s new cut and John Legend’s magnificent piece of latest artistry. I went ahead and purchased the entire albums… not necessarily a standard practice of iTuners but… Despite popular trends, I aim to resist simply purchasing songs I like in lieu of entire albums for a multitude of reasons: It is my firm belief that popular singles, while sometimes rather tasty, do not paint the entire picture (excuse the tired cliché analogy) of the sound or ideas the artist(s) is bringing to the table. When an artist births a new “set” of songs, they have the whole package in mind – if you are willing, they will take you for a walk in a lyrical and musical landscape that summarizes their recent experiences, personality, opinions, passions, and intimate feelings. No song is just randomly generated; someone, somewhere wrote it out of a moment of inspiration and though it may not be catchy in the mainstream arena, it might be the song that makes me rethink something, anything I take for granted.

My second reason is the economics of it (stemming from the business major in me): often, you can get MORE than 10 songs for $9.99 but you have to pay $.99 for a single track… pause…arithmatize… By buying all the tracks, I pay LESS than $.99 per song – sometimes as low as $.80…so why not get the full package?

Thirdly, I like to think I’m giving a little something back to the artist by throwing them a bone for the “filler” tracks that may never reach platinum status. While there are some non-popular tracks that I’ll find good, there are others that do nothing but take up space on my hard drive, occupy a number in the track list, and waste energy in my batteries… With that said, even the most un-enjoyable filler tracks leave something to be learned from a musical and artistic standpoint. Either way, 1/13th of $9.99 is a small price to pay for the experience gained and the lessons learned from hearing ALL the latest, greatest work brought forth by our artists of choice.

Monday, June 25, 2007

New Blog

Well, we'll see how good I am at this... hopefully I can capture some of lifes challenges, contemplations, and celebrations digitally via Blogger. Maybe someone will read it... at least I got stuff off my chest.

-rf